Archives for April 2013

The Worst Excuse Yet for Not Exercising..but funny!

I’ve heard a lot of excuses for not exercising and I’ve come up with many on my own.  Some of the excuses are valid, others borderline on “the dog ate my homework” “the dog ate my running clothes, shoes, water bottle..”  Wait , judging from the puppies I have had that one might actually be true.  🙂

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The one I heard recently was the best yet.  Well maybe not the best but the fact that it came from a guy makes it pretty unbelievable.

If it came from a woman it might fly but only a little.

Am I being sexist here?  You bet!

Just to be clear, this is an absolutely true story.  Talked to the person who actually witnessed it.

So this guy goes to his boss and starts complaining about one of the guys that works out at the company gym around the same time he does.

The boss is listening to this guy  complain and the guy won’t shut up . He just drones on and on and finally makes his point.  The boss is multi tasking, sort of just humoring this chronic complainer while shuffling papers. When he hears his actual complaint he looks up and just says:

“Get Out”!

His complaint?  One of the guys on the treadmill smells so bad that it keeps Homer from being able to exercise.

I’m not sure which is funnier..that his boss told him to get out or his excuse for not exercising.

IT”S A GYM  If there is one place you can stink, it is THE GYM.  I stink in the gym..not as much as the guys but I know I do and it’s okay.

Now if the guy was sitting next to him at work and stinks..I get it..make the boss tell the guy to go shower and get some deodorant but its THE GYM!

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When I heard this all I could think of was a bit comedian Jeff Foxworthy does about the difference between men and women and smells.  Women are totally grossed out.  Guys..well guys smell something like old gym clothes in a bag, and they say something like “Woohee that smells bad” and then walks over to his friend and says’ Hey Jimbo..ya want take a whiff”  like its a badge of honor.

I think the boss had it right.  If you can’t take the smell then “Get out”

I’m off to the gym.  If you need to find me I’ll be the stinky one.

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If I rock the bike, why not the run?

I hate being fooled.  I especially hate it when I do it to myself.  Getting my bike set up with the bike trainer and actually enjoying training inside was such a surprise to me.  I loved it.  So much so I slacked off on my running.  I figured that if I was doing all this work on the bike then when I did get back outside to run it wouldn’t be so hard to get back up to speed.

Think about it.  The bike is aerobic exercise and so is running.  So if I rock the bike then I can rock the run..right?

Wrong.

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It helps but running is totally different than biking.  And I seem to be a slow learner because I have tried to convince myself that they are the same..many times.

For instance if I was doing the elliptical then that had to be the same as the treadmill.  Nope.  Not even in mileage which is one thing I will never understand.

I know I am slow but I can cover a mile on the treadmill in 10-12 minutes.  It takes at least 20 minutes on the elliptical with just as much or sometimes more effort.

There is probably a good explanation but it boggles my mind.

I learned this disparity in fitness levels at a swim class.  Just so you know..and there is no polite way to say this..I suck at swimming.  It’s really not technique but endurance that I need to improve.

In an effort to do improve this I took a swim class specifically for triathletes.  After stating that the swim session kicked my butt and I couldn’t figure it out the swim instructor bluntly told me that it reflected my level of fitness.

WHAT???   Yup..the truth is while I can run and bike pretty well, swimming is another story.   Just so you know, the swim instructor was very kind.  He wasn’t trying to be mean just truthful and I knew he was right.

And that is why I like triathlons.  It is never boring and it is, at least for me, always humbling.

The good thing is when I do kick ass I feel like a gold medalist..even if I am in last place.

I just gotta keep triing!

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