Maybe that is the wrong title. I’m not sure. I just know right now I want to be somewhere else. And yet I know I am where I am needed. I guess. My heart tells a different story.
Five months ago my father passed away suddenly. He was 90, vibrant, full of life until suddenly he wasn’t. I’ve been with my Mom most of the last five months. Someone has been with her non stop since she fell and injured herself on July 5th. Tomorrow I will take her to the orthopedist to check on her broken wrist. The doc only sees patients in this area on Friday. She is anxious to get the cast off. So the right thing to do is keep the appointment and not reschedule.
Every year around this time our son comes home from his job overseas and spends about a month with us. I haven’t seen him since October. As I write this he is about 45 minutes from landing at an airport near our home which is about 2 1/2 hours from where I am now. I was home briefly this week-end so I made his favorite meal and chocolate chip cookies.
I wanted some part of me to be there when he arrived.
Paul will be there to greet our son, bring him home, see his great smile in person, give him a big hug.
I’ll get to see him soon just not soon enough in my book. I should be an adult about this but I don’t want to adult today.
I want to be at the airport anxiously awaiting as I quickly glance over the faces of the arriving passengers until I land on the one that is so familiar to me, and then I want to embarrass him by running to him and grabbing him in a hug.
I’ll get over this. There are worse things I know. I mean he is 30 years old right? But I guess as his Mom he will always be that blonde toddler with the big blue eyes.
Christmas 1988
Sometimes adulting just plain sucks.
