I have been kind of absent here. I had good intentions to get posts written but real life got in the way and then there is my dedication to procrastination. I have written dozens of posts in my head but somehow they never made it onto paper or on the computer.
In a nutshell our experience with Covid 19 had an added dimension. So much so that the quarantine was on top of me before I knew it. I was like..wait, what? Right before it reared its ugly head my elderly mother suffered a stroke. The neurologist ( via the computer screen) assured us that it was the best kind of stroke to have and all of her deficits would resolve.
I wish I could remember his name because honestly I would like to egg his house or at least tell him he was so wrong.
You see while my mother suffered no physical deficits from the stroke it threw her into dementia. She could not return to her independent living apartment and by the time she got out of rehab Covid 19 had actually locked her out of the facility. We ended up bringing her to our house. For the sake of the quarantine it was the best option but with it came a ton of other problems including keeping her safe as she constantly tried to get out of the house.
About an hour away from me, my best friend, had a similar situation. Her mother in law was gravely ill. She needed round the clock caretakers and in July entered hospice.
She was my lifeline and I hope I was hers. She was the person I could talk to…as in I could say anything to her and there was no judgement, no shoulding, no criticism. We gave each other unconditional love and understanding.
We understood moving up cocktail hour a few hours, tears, frustrations, paperwork, the need to vent, and lots of dark humor which we both desperately needed. We shared resources, tips and tricks and became each others “pushers” as in “hey this is on sale” or “I just added this to my cart and thought of you.”
Our situations both changed in July. We made the difficult but needed decision to move my mother to Memory Care and sadly Debbie’s mother in law ( who I knew and loved dearly) succumbed to cancer.
All through this we would get texts from each other “you up?” the answer was always YES! I recently told her that if she had texted me at 3am ( and I heard it) the answer would still be yes and I know the same is true for her.
Our situations continue in one form or another. My mothers dementia is increasing and that is painful to watch. Debbie is dealing with tying up all the paperwork, selling the house etc. We continue to be there for each other.
We met for lunch this week for a belated birthday celebration ( her birthday was in June) and she had a gift for me.
Her mother in law had received it from her best friend and now Debbie was passing it on. I love that it is continuing it’s journey to another set of best friends. The fact that it came from Carol made it even more special.
Truer words were never spoken:
So on this Thoughtful Thursday if you are lucky enough to have a best friend, call her, text her, send her flowers because she is to be treasured! Now go out and make it a Thoughtful One !
P.S. A photo of Debbie and me..its about 10 yrs old but hey thats what best friends do 🙂
