His words mattered to my 14 year old gawky adolescent self.
I knew they weren’t exactly true but coming from him I knew it was more about the essence of who I was and still am as a person.
I spent alot of time with my grandparents at their farm in Michigan. Most summers in fact.
Often I was there with my siblings, parents and cousins.
This time I was there all by myself and it was glorious.
Only many years later did I realize how lucky I was to spend summers outside, hiding in cornfields, riding tractors and the old mare, having picnics by the creek, eating my grandmother’s homemade bread and jelly and every morning running to the mailbox to see if my mother had written all the news from the neighborhood.
One evening we watched a beauty pageant. Miss America or Miss U.S.A. I was all arms and legs that had grown so fast I didn’t know what to do with them. I sported heavy metal braces and my hair was straight and always seemed to be halfway long and halfway short. It was about as confused as I was at that time.
I was also sandwiched in between a much younger and very cute blue eyed blonde sister and an older sister who was beautiful, the essence of cool and seemed to have skipped right over the awkward phase. Somehow I got hers and mine for it seemed to stretch on forever.
We always watched some T.V. in the evening as the day wound down, trying not to move too much and avoiding the leather sofa and chair that immediately stuck to our skin from the sticky non abaiting summer heat. There was no air conditioning, if we were lucky we enjoyed the occasional random breeze and we were always serenaded by the symphony of sounds from the creeking furniture as it expanded and contracted with the temperature.
We watched the beauty pageant and I was in awe of the beautiful women who graced the screen in evening gowns, swimsuits and then showed off their amazing talents.
A crown was placed on the winner and I headed off to bed.
As I crawled into bed my grandfather came to say goodnight. He gave me a kiss and sat on the bed, patted my leg and said “Hey sis, just so you know, you are just as pretty and talented as any of those girls on the show tonight” I smiled, nodding my head. Maybe I said thank you but I am not sure. I do know my heart was full and I was smiling.
I was also smart enough to know it wasn’t exactly true. In reality it wasn’t true at all, at least not at that moment.
What I did know was it didn’t matter because my Papa thought it was true. He knew the essence of who I was and in those few words he let me know I was a beautiful person in his eyes. That meant the world to me.
All these years later I still remember that moment, those feelings of how he made me feel beautiful and loved.
His words mattered more than any expensive present. His words were a gift and still make me smile.
His words mattered and so do yours. Share your words with the ones you love.
Kind words from the heart. They are the best gift anyone can ever receive.
Thank-you Papa.
As always, Keep Triing,
Jennifer
P.S. I wanted to include a photo of me during those awkward years but they must be in a box that is hidden away somewhere..darn it all. Instead I will share a a photo of me and my grandparents on my wedding day about 8 years after that evening with his beautiful words. Turns out I did grow into myself in so many ways. I still miss them.
